Time for a new 'do

It's about that time again...my hair is hanging in my eyes, roots are showing...yep, time to go to the hairdresser. Whenever I'm preparing for a new 'do, I go through the usual collection of magazines and websites, looking for that magic hairstyle that will transform my unruly mane into a thing of beauty. Sometimes it does. Sometimes it doesn't look anything like what I had in mind. I get a new look, but sometimes "new" isn't always "better". Oh well, it's only hair. It'll grow back.

For years, I chose my hairstyles according to what I thought the person I was in a relationship with would find attractive. Not being attached at this point, I'm free to figure out what I want me to look like. What makes me feel my best. Frankly, I think that's the way it should be anyway. If your feelings of attractiveness depend on whether someone else finds you appealing or not, then you'll be at loose ends unless you have someone around to tell you how to dress or wear your hair. You won't know what to think of yourself if no one is around to hold up the mirror.

One thing I found more than a little disturbing when researching my latest hairstyle, was a number of articles detailing the extremely negative feelings men have about us cutting our hair. Okay, I know that guys like long hair. Everybody knows that. But this goes beyond a simple matter of personal preference. One article detailed how the author cut her long hair, much to the chagrin of her long time boyfriend...he told her he didn't find her attractive anymore and they broke up shortly afterward. Really. Good thing she found out before saying "for better or worse, for sickness and in health"...I think we need to add another vow to that - "in long hair and in short." Another woman said her boyfriend didn't like her short hair because when he woke up beside her, he felt like he was in bed with a guy. Wow, what a charmer.

I think if a relationship is dependent on a hairstyle it's not much of a relationship. Hair grows. We cut it.  It turns grey. It falls out on your head and grows back in your ears. It does all sorts of things that you aren't necessarily going to like, and it isn't going to ask your permission first. My advice to those follicle-fanatics who want to choose their mates by what's on their heads? Deal with it. Life brings change. If you're lucky, you'll leave this world with more hair than you came in with, but it isn't that way for everyone.

One of my dearest friends had long hair. I cut it for her once and couldn't believe how thick is was - it took me forever just to trim a few inches off of it. She battled cancer for several years and unfortunately, she lost her enviable locks because of the treatments. She told me that when she lost most of her hair, her husband shaved her head. Flowers and candy are nice, but that, to me, was one of the most loving things I could imagine a man doing for his wife. Youth, beauty...hair...they're all fleeting. You have to love what's inside. Hopefully that's what you're committing to when you say "I do".

Well, it's back to searching the 'net for my next hairstyle. I think I need to take my own advice: be fearless! Maybe I'll reinvent myself as a redhead this time.... ;o)